


I'll Go To It Laughing

by thenewpyt



Category: Gilmore Girls
Genre: Spoilers for A Year in the Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-27
Updated: 2016-11-27
Packaged: 2018-09-02 14:02:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8670397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thenewpyt/pseuds/thenewpyt
Summary: Rory's entire life is changing, but from this point on, it's on her own terms, she's the one forging her own path. After everything that's happened, she just wants what's best and she'll do what she can to get it, no matter what. She is a Gilmore after all.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't resist sorting out all the thoughts I had in my head after the ending of A Year In The Life, so this is how I feel things ended up after everything. And to be honest, I don't know how it ends, I'm piecing things together as I go. I don't know how long this will end up being, I guess until I feel like I'm okay with the way it goes. And yes, I do have Rory/Logan and Rory/Jess tagged. I ship them both so much and the ending didn't help me figure out how I wanted things to go, so this story could go either. I'm letting the words guide me. Let me know what you think and how you felt after watching AYINL!

_"I know not all that may be coming, but be it what it will, I'll go to it laughing." - Moby Dick_

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“I’m pregnant.”

The two words that would send her life down a path she hadn’t been expected, a path she hadn’t known if she was ready to explore yet, but in the weeks leading up to her finding the nerve to tell her mother, Robert Frost was the one man that helped her through it. “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I— I took the one less traveled by.” Whatever Rory had learned in her thirty two years of life had led her to this moment, and it wouldn’t be easy, she had seen first hand the struggles a single mom went through, but her mother was forever the strongest woman she knew and Rory had learned so much from her, enough that her shaky confidence in her own abilities to be a mother weren’t quite as shaky as they could have been. Her bright blue eyes searched her mother’s own as she gave the older woman a small smile.

The look of shock on Lorelai’s face and the fact that she had rendered her mother speechless caused a manic giggle to pass her lips. The noise seemed to break the ice that had formed and Lorelai spoke quickly, disbelief and sarcasm lacing her words. “Well, I guess I can at least rule out your night in a galaxy far, far away with Chewbacca then because you’re entirely too skinny to be that far along.” Lorelai reached her hand out and found Rory’s, as she searched for the right words. “Does he know?” Rory shook her head and tightened her own hold of Lorelai’s hand. “No, I haven’t decided yet. When he left, I made it known that was the end of it. He’s got his heiress and the life his parents always wanted for him. I don’t know if it’s even right of me to take that away from him.” Rory sighed and stretched her legs out on the steps in front of her, crossing her ankles as she looked out at the town in front of her, _her home_ , the one place in the world she could really call home, even if that meant she fell into the thirty something gang.

Lorelai shifted slightly so her body was angled towards Rory and she let go of her hand so she could tuck a stray piece of hair behind Rory’s ear. “Whatever you decide to do, it’s your decision, but you have a chance to do things differently than I did. You’re a grown woman, you don’t have to struggle with this alone.” Lorelai gave her an understanding smile. “We both know I’m not the biggest fan of Logan, but I think you should talk to him. He’s not your father and he’s not Mitchum, you’ve both got a chance to be the people you want to be. And even if he decides to not be around, you’ve got me. And you’ve always had Luke and Lane and you know Paris will be there, anger management issues and all.”

Rory chuckled quietly, the image of Paris marching around and shouting obscenities and yammering on about how they were strong independent women, men be damned and they didn’t need Doyle or Logan to hell with them, the thought causing her lips to split into a grin. “I’m terrified, mom. I’m terrified of where I go from here and how things are going to change, but as terrified as I am, is it awful of me to say that I’m happy too? I’ve been so listless and all over the place trying to find my new path that this feels…. right.” Lorelai closed the small gap between them and rested her head on top of Rory’s, planting a kiss on the top of her hair. “It’s not awful. It’s not the perfect situation, but life never makes it easy. We’re Gilmore’s, we forge our own paths.” Standing up abruptly, she stretched her hand out and waited for Rory to take hold. “Come on kiddo, we’ve got lots to celebrate. I have it on good authority my husband has sparkling water in the diner, you can thank all those weird hipster kids for them.” She shimmied a little and helped Rory stand. “Husband. I can definitely get used to saying that. And this time around, it’s the one I’m supposed to be with.” Rory let her mother pull her across the town square, catching the glances from Luke as he stood pointing out different parts of the decorations Kirk had done. Lorelai reached her hand up and grabbed the key off the door frame and stuck it in the lock, wiggling it around before pushing the door open with her hip.

Rory stood at the counter as her mother wandered into the kitchen, reemerging with an armful of bottles of sparkling water and a few glasses. She breezed past and threw a sidelong glance. “Well don’t just stand there, any longer and your tiny body will look like you swallowed a watermelon, time’s ticking kiddo.” Lorelai adjusted the items in her arms and finagled the door open, kicking it the rest of the way with her foot. Following behind, Rory let the door close after her as they made their way over, the rare smile on Michel’s face giving Rory the warm and fuzzies. Lorelai passed out glasses and poured drinks, her smile never once leaving her face. As she finished, she held up her glass for a toast. “To things finally falling into place and new adventures that await.” Rory smiled softly and clinked her glass against her mother’s before taking a sip, the bubbles tickling her throat as they slid down. Everything was about to change and she was ready. Well, as ready as she’d ever be.

\------------------------------------------

Two months into her pregnancy and she had yet to start showing, not that it upset Rory in the slightest. She knew the minute she started showing, everyone in town would start fawning all over her and she’d never get anything done until her kid was fully grown and out on their own. So far as things went, they had kept things pretty quiet about the pregnancy, only the people closest to her aware that anything was different. She wasn’t ready for the world to know just yet, especially since she still hadn’t gotten around to calling Logan. The reactions had been varied, Lane was ecstatic and brought her over the well worn stack of pregnancy books she’d been holding onto since she found out she was pregnant with Steve and Kwan and Luke was less than thrilled at first, but after Rory had convinced him he didn’t need to give Logan a talking to and that she would promise to cut back on her coffee intake, he started to come around. It was Emily that Rory was most nervous about telling, but surprisingly her grandmother took it much better than expected. Rory wasn’t sure whether to chalk it up to the Nantucket air or something else, but Emily didn’t even spare more than a “Oh, that Huntzberger boy? His father is still a jerk.” before having Rory promise her that she would see her great grandchild for more than just major holidays, for which Rory was eternally grateful

Dragging her eyes away from the Macbook screen and the blinking cursor as she mulled over the same sentence she’d been staring at for the past five minutes, she hit the home button on her phone, the screen lighting up. Shit, she was supposed to meet Lane at Luke’s fifteen minutes ago. She slid the unlock button and pulled up her text messages, clicking Lane’s name and shooting off a text. _I’m sorry, give me ten minutes and I’ll be there. I completely spaced. Is it too early to blame pregnancy brain?_ She pushed her chair back and stood up, pressing the save button on her work before shutting the laptop screen and rushing out into the kitchen and down the hallway, her fingers snatching her keys from the dish on the table and her other hand grabbing her jacket, careening out the front door and into her waiting Prius. It didn’t take her long to drive across town, her car sliding into one of the parallel parking spots in front of Luke’s. She killed the ignition and hopped out, the driver’s side door closing behind her with a snap. She hurried in through the front door and plopped down in a chair across from Lane, her breath quickened and body slumped as she worked to catch her breath. “Seriously, I’m not meant to rush. It’s a good thing I never did track in high school, I would have been the worst track star ever. They’d write ballads over how bad I was.” Lane let out a loud snort and pushed the cup of coffee over, closer to her friend. “It’s all the books you carried around. They slowed you down, turned you into a turtle, you never had a chance. Also the coffee is decaf, Luke wouldn’t give me regular when I mentioned I was meeting you. It was like pulling teeth to get him to even bring the decaf. Then I reminded him of things and he realized he didn’t want to deal with grumpy Rory, he’s a quick learner when he needs to be.”

Wrapping her fingers around the cup, she sighed as the warmth spread through the tips of her fingers, the autumn air was beginning to pick up the chill of winter, and it wouldn’t be much longer before her mother was talking about the snow she could smell. “He’s still adjusting to everything. But bless him for falling into protective grandpa mode so quickly, it’s also his newest excuse for making me eat healthier. Mom keeps slipping me pop tarts when he’s not looking though. Oh! Speaking of grandpa's, I called my dad who in typical Christopher Hayden fashion offered my future offspring full college tuition to wherever they want and an offer of setting up a trust for me since things are about to get _‘really expensive’_. The air quotes are necessary, the way he stressed it over the phone, I could practically see him doing them.”

Lane shook her head, her eyes rolling behind the lenses of her glasses, “I know I’ve said this before, but our parents are very, very strange human beings.” She sipped on her own coffee and gave Rory a pointed look. “Have you called _him_ yet?” There was a little bit of venom laced around the word him and Rory raised an eyebrow. “I haven’t called him yet, but I will. I just want to sort things out on my own first before I drag him into this. If he even wants in. But whatever happens, I need to know you won’t maim him. I don’t know if the Gilmore name can sweet talk you out of a prison sentence for attempted murder.” Lane huffed loudly and scrunched her nose in indignation. “Fine, I promise I won’t maim him, but I can’t guarantee I’ll be nice to him. Asshole.” Letting out a chuckle, Rory rolled her eyes lightly. “I wouldn’t ever ask you to be. I’m glad to have you in my corner Lane Kim.”

\------------------------------------------

Three months in and if you squinted and tilted your head just right, she was starting to show. It wasn’t much, but she had started to notice the swell that was forming, a sign that she really was growing another life in her body. Something she still hadn’t gotten used to saying. The chilly morning found her wrapped up in a blanket on the couch, her phone in her hand as she spun it in circles, willing herself to dial the number, his number. She hadn’t spoken to him in almost three months, not since the Life and Death Brigade had swept her off on one final whirlwind adventure. Three months full of radio silence. Not that she had expected to hear from him, she had been pretty clear in the inn that they were through. And of course it had broken her heart, but after ten years of their back and forth, it was time. Logan had found his path and Rory had stumbled off hers and she couldn’t be in his life if she wasn’t actually in it and there just wasn’t room for Rory Gilmore. She stopped spinning her phone and stared at it, as if it were possessed and would attack her at any moment. She rolled her eyes and inwardly chastised herself. _Get it together, Gilmore. You’re a grown woman, you can do this._

She took a deep breath and unlocked the screen, her fingers finding his contact quickly, the european number a glaring reminder that they were oceans apart. Pressing the number and placing the phone against her ear, she listened to the rings, praying he wouldn’t pick up and she could deal with it another day, but of course she wasn’t that lucky. Her heartbeat quickened as she heard his voice coming through the speaker “Ace, hey. Is everything okay?” She couldn’t contain the scoff that escaped her lips and she spoke slowly and deliberately, trying her hardest not to let the words fall out a jumbled mess. “Well, that depends on your definition of okay… Logan, I-I’m sorry to tell you this over the phone and please don’t think this is my way of trying to convince you to come back to me but,” she took a deep breath let it out slowly before speaking again, “I’m pregnant.” The silence on the other end of the line gave her pause, the thought flickering across her mind that he’d hung up on her. After what felt like an eternity, the rumble of his voice crossed the line, the confusion evident in his words. “You’re pregnant? Like bun in the oven, I’m going to be a dad, pregnant?”

“Surprise, it’s a baby!” She hoped the lightness in her voice would help keep him from hopping on the next plane to Stars Hollow, something neither of them needed to happen right now. “I don’t want this to change things. I mean, I know it will change things, but it doesn’t have to complicate things for you. I know that your marriage to Odette is coming up and this doesn’t need to stop it. I don’t want it too.” She heard the all too familiar sigh that passed his lips and she knew his brain was trying to process. It was understandable, it wasn’t like this was just a passing, Hey, how’s everything, good, keep in touch kind of call. “Ace, I can’t just pretend like this isn’t happening. How am I supposed to marry someone else when you’re out there, pregnant with my kid? I can’t not be part of their life. We both know our kid deserves a better dad than either of us ever had.” Rory ran her tongue across her lips, the chill in the house leaving them tingly. “If you want to be in their life, I won’t keep you out, but you can’t leave Odette for me. I’m not going to be the reason you give up on your own life, I won’t be the reason for you being bitter later on down the road, I can’t be. We’ll figure things out as we go, but you will always be their father, Logan, no matter where this road leads us. And I will always love you, deep in my heart, there will always be a spot for you, but I just wanted you to know. Next time you’re in New York, let me know and we’ll meet somewhere and talk things through. Take care of yourself, Logan.”

“You too, Ace.”


End file.
